Finding Ourselves Does Not Mean Happiness

The other day I was sitting in a class where we were discussing service and helping others.

My thoughts immediately were turned to happiness.

People everywhere all over the world are searching for one word: happiness.

With the world in which we live today, many struggles come because of the search of this one word.

That is because we are doing it all wrong.

Iphone. Ipad. Itunes.

I. I. I.

We live in a world searching for happiness within ourselves--trying to get the nicest clothes to make us happy, the greatest technology, make the most money-- only to wind up still not being satisfied and still not being happy.

People all trying to find themselves and make a statement of what they are through these things, ironically does not make them happy. It couldn't be further from the truth.

It's losing ourselves that makes us happy. Losing ourselves in the service of others, looking outside of our little bubble and the problems we may have. Seeing those that are less fortunate and having the courage to help them out. That is what brings true happiness.

Recognizing that you may not be able to afford that gift for Christmas, but you have a roof over your head and clothes on your back. 

Gratitude makes everything you have enough.

I can only imagine what the world would be like if everybody lived by that motto. 

Think about something. If I 

was stripped today of everything I had-- my clothes, food, money, home, technology--WHO would I be?

We try to define ourselves with the things that we do. Being a football player, holding certain leadership positions, being an artist-- all of these are good things. 

But if these we stripped  from you. WHO would you be? These things may make up WHAT you are, but can they define WHO you are? 

So ask yourselves. How will you lose yourself?

Till next time,

Emmaline

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ART

Do you ever feel like you need to take your own advice? 

Many of you don't know the side of me that get's sad, anxious, down and has really HARD days.

Days that I feel like just talking to people is a huge step for me.

Luckily today I was able to find something to brighten one of those moments up for me. Hope it helps you all too. 

I wanted to share something I wrote June 18, 2013, while sitting in a small cafe.

ART.

The fellows sitting next to me in this cafe are artists. Illustrating… creating.

In front of me are books. Words, created, written: art.

Above me music plays, the gentlemen to my right taps his leather dress shoe along. Sounds-- clashing, harmonizing, beautiful-- art.

The drink I hold in my hand: a creation with an extra drop of honey soothing my sore throat and congested nose. Helpful. A helpful work of art.

Surrounding us everywhere is art. Beautiful creations, The unique ones capture our attention, the perfect ones don't even catch our eye.

What world will we create?

I hope, I hope…

 it’s a unique, lovely, colorful, spontaneous one.

Splashes of crazy, bumps along the surface, red for courage, blue for loneliness, or perhaps we simply adore the color blue. Green for the beauty of the earth we enjoy, yellow for the intense sunshine engulfing us like a blanket.

Splashes and splatters, lines and patterns.

Tea to soothe a sore throat, foot tapping, music blaring, hands painting, people creating.

Happiness. Laughter. Love. Heartbreak. Trial.

Stepping back I see it now.

The beautiful portrait, the big picture, so unique with different colors and patterns. Imperfect, but juuust right.

Absolutely beautiful.

Life.

Leonid Afremov
Have a wonderful Friday! 
XO
Emmaline

Turn the Shirt Around

The other day I woke up frazzled- anxious to get to school on time. The start of a new school year will do that to you. Running to class I was early, sorted my things out and prepared myself for the lecture. As my professor began the discussion, I was intently following along. Until one question he proposed caught my attention. Being the writer that I am, I began jotting down notes and expanding on this one question, tuning out of the next part of the lecture-- my eyes locked on the words filling up my screen in front of me. 

"And how do you feel about that?" 

I zapped back to reality. Looking up, the professor's eyes were now connected with mine. 

"Oh," I replied. "I'm sorry. Just give me a second." Reading the question on the powerpoint we were now discussing, I couldn't focus. You know when you're put on the spot ill-prepared like that, and all you can think about is how ill-prepared you are? 

Turning more and more red, I began to speak. 

Word vomit.

Blah. Blah. Blah.

"And that is how I feel about that."

"Oookay." My professor replied.

Ughhh. Second day of this class and my life is already over.

I walked out of class only to feel my shirt that seemed just a bit higher than usual. After all, I am at BYU, the more modest the better right? But then again feeling that zap! back to reality... I look down at my shirt.

It was backward.

Ah! Did I just admit that right here for all of social media to see????

Gasp.

I ran to Daniel and explained to him that I had to go to the bathroom right. Now. NOW.

And I changed my shirt. 

But you know what I've realized? Who cares. Okay, so my shirt was on backward. Who. Cares. 

Life goes on, people! As soon as I turned that white shirt around, so I did with my day.

And so can we all! Life is all about good times, hard times, sad times, sweet times. I believe that happiness is a choice. It's okay to get upset, to have life a little backward sometimes. But we need to be able to turn the shirt around-- our attitudes. Backward, sideways, inside-out-- FLAUNT IT.

Have a great Saturday!

Emmaline

A Memory

I sit and wait. Staring out the window, the drops run down my blurry reflection as the rain becomes more intense. But everyone else? Asleep. I know it has been a long ride, but really? How could they sleep at a time like this? Sometimes I wonder if I am different. Different than everyone else—alive and awake in curiosity, not standing for an eye to close in an amazing experience like this. But I was, oh, so tired. My feet worn from the days of travel, happy to finally be sitting on a bus. Days of laughter and endless games with friends; tiring, but so worthwhile. My mind drifts… somehow watching the rain fall allows for a beautiful moment of peace and exploration of the mind. I feel so blessed to be on this trip. To see the world in a new way. To find love, deeper than I thought I could have, but not with a who or a someone, but rather, a what. A place. A place where I discovered myself and beauty. Learning history, and the beauty of God’s creation. This is why I cannot close my eyes. The moment might pass me by. Oh how I wish I could freeze time! “Sniff”, I hear from the seat next to me. Looking over, I see Matt with his bloody nose. That kid. Could never handle the high altitude any way. Maybe he’d like some of my gummy bears. You know, they are the best I think I’ve ever had. Man this place with it’s food. It is perfect. “Here”, I said, tossing him a few gummy bears. A toothy smile from him. He liked them. A smile right back from me. “Look, out there”, I whispered. “The lake. Isn’t it beautiful?” “If only we could tip the cows”, he said. I smiled. Matt was always my partner in crime. My mind again wanders.

We run off the bus, excited to be in the next place. Everyone is finally awake. If only they could have seen the journey here. I run too, in my navy blue target shoes, shorts and t-shirt with my swimsuit underneath. We were headed for the lake! My mind races, feet trying to keep up as I run toward the beautiful place in the rain. A swing! Yippee! I jump on the old tire swing hanging from the beautiful willow tree, swinging, free from the cares of the world. I watch my friends as they dash into the lake, swimming toward the dock in the middle. It’s slow motion. No camera or video could capture this moment like my mind can. I smile as I watch them giggle and splash each other. I wish to chase them. Darting into the water, the water feels indifferent from the warm, rainy air. I swim to the middle of no where—the wooden planks in the middle of the vast, blue lake, little cottages all around us. Just a few kids in our teenage years—young, wild, free. I count in my head. “One, Two, Three!” I’m in midair. Jumping, off the dock, with the swiss alps surrounding me. Life cannot get much better.

            It seems to me that in this moment I was completely free. Not bound by the camera, not seeing life through a lens or through my closed eye lids while dreaming. But awake, conscious, free—memories as crystal clear and effortless as the beautiful turquoise, Switzerland water.

Opposing Fear

Hello everyone! I hope you all had a fabulous Valentine's and President's Day weekend! Ours was full of adventure. It was a blast!! 

Today in class, we were discussing marriage. Of course, I love this topic :). We talked about why people just don't seem to be getting married anymore. We discussed that since the 1960s, the rate has gone from a whopping 59% to 20% of people ages 18-29 getting married. Wow.

Here are the top 10 reasons that statistics have show for why people don't get married (for LDS and non-LDS people-- in no particular order):

-Fear of making a mistake 

-Need more emotional maturity

-No opportunity to marry

-Desire to finish school

-Fear of responsibility

-Desire to establish a career

-Fear of responsibility of parenthood

-Pressure from family not to marry

-Pressure from friends not to marry

-Unworthy to get married

Now how many of you have heard or seen these take place? 

I know in my own life, it was even a problem.

I was just recently married at the young age of 19, and I received every piece of advice you could imagine. Especially with a mission call, everyone gave me their two sense on how I should live my life. It used to confuse me, make me scared, feel like I was lacking, and question this choice.

Ultimately I realized that this decision was up to me, the Lord, and Daniel. I felt so at peace with it and that it was right and the timing was right. So what else matters? At the end of the day, I am answering to God and to no one else. At the end of the day, I am doing what He would have me do. At the end of the day, I chose my love and loved my choice. And I am soooo, so happy. Nothing is better than kneeling across the altar with the one you love and committing yourself to them, knowing in that moment that the decision you are making is right. Not just for today, or for a few months, but for eternity. To have a best friend, confidant, and lover. Daniel is truly helping me become the person I want and need to be. We have been blessed with true happiness since making this decision and trying to live true to our covenants.

In the reasons above, I found it interesting that 3 of them were the result of fear. We know that fear is the opposite of faith. I saw this video of Elder Russell M. Nelson of the LDS Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, and it touched me deeply. It reminded me of the experience I just recently went through, feeling peace when people around me may have not.

Russell M. Nelson knows who he is and does not live in fear. Russell was married in 1945, at the age of 20. He graduated medical school at the age of 22, gained many awards and achievements from being a heart surgeon, and performed the first successful heart surgery. He saved the life of a beloved man, who would later become a prophet, President Kimball. Elder Nelson is doing what the Lord created him to do.

May we live a life of love and faith, not listening to what the world has to say about us. Live so that the Lord will be on our side, remembering our divine identity and purpose here, and have an eternal perspective, so we can conquer all.

Of Female Beauty

      In contemporary society there are many attractive voices clamoring to be heard. Many offer strong opinions on what makes a woman beautiful.  Media today has all sorts to say about that—creating an unrealistic image in our society of what a beautiful woman is.  Most women do not fit that mold, leaving them unsatisfied and struggling with self-image problems. 

Recognizing the gap between reality and popular culture, the makers of Dove beauty products developed “A Campaign for Beauty,” wherein the answer to what makes someone pretty would be revealed.  Creators are determined to make media, models, and the human race aware that one does not have to fit into a uniformed Barbie mold. In a commercial created by Dove titled, “Evolution”, we watch a model who starts off as looking like herself come to work.  The model arrives ready to shoot pictures for magazines, fashion, billboards—the images that we all see everyday. 

When I first saw the model, my naïve mind thought, “Wow, she is not like the person I see in the magazines. She doesn’t look like she has the features that those beautiful models possess.”  Hmmm…why would I think that?  After all, she was that model.   But what I saw next introduced me to reality. Producers took this model, put pounds of makeup on her, covered up all of her imperfections, did her hair, changed the lighting, and then snapped pictures. 

      But the process didn’t stop there. They then took one of her best photos and doctored it. They elongated her neck, made her eyes bigger, airbrushed her face, made her features more striking, and slenderized her cheeks. That was the image that appeared on the billboard. The image that people pointed at as they walked passed.  That is the image women see and think, “Wow, she’s so perfect. How come I don’t look like that?” The answer is simple.  Because even the model doesn’t look like that.  Hardly anyone does. 

      Our perception of female beauty has been distorted by popular culture. And whether we like it or not, this is something that defines us. That makes up part of our society. That girls and women everywhere from the time they can apply makeup and from the time they watch their moms paint on cosmetics, strive to be like. And the matter of fact is: we will not be satisfied with who we are and what we look like if we keep striving to be someone else—a woman who in many cases, does not exist or who is also unsatisfied with her looks. 

      This image of beauty can prevent us from reaching our full potential. What if women considered that being beautiful was defined by being unique, confident, happy and healthy? Now that would be an image worth plastering across a billboard. Women everywhere have become addicted to finding the latest trend to look like that… but who decides what that is? I admire someone who is 100% confident in herself—one who strives to achieve what God would have her. 

No other earthly creature competes for vanity the same way humans do…and we admire and love the many qualities of each. Consider dogs, for instance.  Take the competition and emotion out of the human beauty equation, and it is easy to recognize what makes one species of dog from another—all are beautiful and unique.  And we simply classify them based on what we value most.  Some recognize the Golden Retrievers for their loyalty; another adores a poodle for its curly crazy hair. Any way you cut it, a Golden Retriever, no matter how hard it tries, will never be a poodle. Bottom line. And you know what? I think I’m okay with that.

Emmaline 

To watch Dove's commercial, click HERE